This afternoon, my father got a letter from Melania Trump, herself. We're always getting Trump mail for some reason. We think that it's because they know that my white father is surrounded by Indians and they're worried he might need help.
It was the typical bullshit: The Democrats are going to put us on a "ruinous course." So... over 197,000 deaths aren't already ruinous? She goes on to say that being First Lady has been very inspiring for her, since she is "humbled and honored to do all [she] can for America." WHAT HAS SHE DONE? Made a fake cyberbullying campaign? Ruin the White House garden?
But then the funniest part is her signature:
Let's zoom in:
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF SIGNATURE IS THAT? THAT'S LITERALLY JUST SQUIGGLES.
It's literally just an EKG.
Exhibit A:
Like you didn't even try? I can maybe see an 'M' but that's just because it's made up of up and down lines anyway.
But I just started wondering like what would happen if Trump just came back from a golf course or a country club (that has a golf course) and he's like, "Hey, Melania. Did anyone call the White House while I was gone?"
And then she'd be like, "Oh yeah. It's cool. I wrote it down."
And then Donald goes over and sees this:
Well.
At least she didn't steal EVERYTHING from Michelle Obama.
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